rbf syndrome | [jessica fernández]

I have been avoiding the truth for so long that it has become my eternal torment. I believed that if I kept quiet and accepted it as a reality I would live a normal life. I tried to ignore the disturbed faces of every stranger that passes by and stares deeply at my face. The “are you OK” or “is there something wrong?” and the worried expressions of the people close to me. I can’t bear it any longer, all these years having to carry this calvary, for what? Pretending that as long as I put on a forced smile everything would be fine. “YES I’M OK” how many time do I have to repeat myself for everyone to finally understand. Well I say:



So for everyone here: I have a confession to make and it is that I suffer from RBF Syndrome… There I said it. It's a real condition and many people suffer from it, it is actually more common than any of you imagine. No, it is not life threatening and there is no treatment for it, you just either have it or you don't. It is not something I can control, in fact to my defense I myself am not even aware once I start showing the symptoms. It’s a real pain but it is something I have do deal with day after day.

Now, you are probably wondering what the hell is RBF Syndrome, well RBF stands for Resting Bitch Face.  And the correct definition  (given by the internet) of this condition is as follows (clears throat):

Resting bitch face syndrome is when somebody is relaxing, listening to another speak, driving, walking, reflecting or otherwise calm but they have a semi-murderous facial expression. People with this condition look annoyed, angry, frustrated or pissed. They look like their partner cheated on them, they stepped on shit, or have a debt so big that they would need 3 lifetimes and it still wouldn't be enough, when in reality they are completely happy.

So yeah, having to put up with every busybody asking useless questions about a person's well being and giving life advice that is not even applicable to themselves. Posing as psychologists or philosophers prying into other's personal affairs, as if I actually wanted to hear such nonsense:

              You are beautiful so just smile
 Everything will be ok, don't let the bad thoughts ruin your happiness
Don't worry, when one door closes another opens

What gave them a reason to think that I was upset? Well maybe my face could express that, but truth be told I was just probably thinking about how delicious was that chicken I had for lunch or maybe thinking, “I should study today for that test I have on Tuesday, but hey I still got 3 days left”. REALLY I'm perfectly fine. I'm happy like a puppy after meeting his long life friend once he returns from work, or someone who was able to discharge at the bathroom after holding it for a long time. I don't need your unnecessary pity when I'm having a splendid time.

Then there are the random scared faces of the curious pedestrians that can't seem to mind their own business. Probably thinking that I might hate humanity and I plan to take over the world or detonate a bomb on the train. But for me my face expresses that I'm the friendliest person in the world and in my mind I'm like: 

So next time you think that I might be miserable and need advice or think that I'm the biggest hater in the world, just remember that I'm just a victim of RBF Syndrome.

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